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Build your confidence and self-esteem

Do you lack the confidence to do the things you really want to do?

Do you want to change the direction your life is taking?

Self-confidence is about being comfortable in your own skin.  A confident person is one who tends to see the positive side of things; someone who believes in him or herself, someone who communicates assertively, that can expresses themselves well.  It’s someone who feels that their best is good enough and worries far less about failure and what others might be thinking.

When you learn to be a confident person you learn good communication skills, you learn to be assertive and socially comfortable. You learn to think positively and to accept yourself and love yourself for who you are, not who you think you might be. 

Confidence is really more about the way you feel about yourself.  Some people end up learning negative things about themselves that makes them doubt themselves.  The good news is that if they can learn to think negatively, they can learn to think positively too. This means that just as they have learnt to dislike or doubt themselves, they can learn about the wonderful, unique person that they are.

Every evening, before you go to sleep, write a list of all the positive things that have happened to you that day. They don’t have to be big things, it could be anything. When you’ve finished tuck it under your pillow and sleep. Do this every evening before you sleep and it will help calm your busy brain and to have a more positive attitude to your life.

So now, if you build your confidence, what difference will it make for you? If you begin to believe in yourself and believe that you can succeed you are going to achieve.

Having this new found belief will encourage you to make the moves you need to make in order to make changes and move forward in your life.

                                                      by Claire McDonough (2012)

 

 

During the years that I have been delivering confidence and self-esteem building courses I have noticed common traits in most of the people who attend. They all arrive on the courses believing that they are different from everyone else and that their feelings of fear and discomfort in the company of others are only something that they feel. They often say that they feel that they can’t do what other people do, that it’s different for them. The one thing that binds them together as a group is that as soon as they begin to learn about each other they come to realize that they are not so different and that the problems they are experiencing are common to many. 

When you want to build your confidence and self-esteem it is important that you spend some time thinking about what it is that you want to be confident at. What is it that you want to change? Is it to be able to socialize more easily, to get a job, to change relationships, to feel able to take control of your life? You need to be clear about what it is that you want to change, so that you will know when it has happened.   Sounds obvious really, but it can sometimes take a bit of thinking about. But if you are clear right from the start what it is that you want to change, it will make it much easier to plan your goals.

When you decide what is going to change, it will help enormously if you try to break it down into small achievable steps, things that you know that you can do, be imaginative, make it fun if you can. So when you come to start working on it you will be more likely to succeed. If you are successful right from the start you will be much more likely to want to take the next step and the next.

Try and think about all the things that might get in the way of achieving your goals and think of the answers before they happen. This way you’re less likely to throw in the cards and give up. 

When you are planning to do something that might be quite difficult, a reward is both important and enjoyable and if you achieve you goals you deserve a treat, so make sure you reward yourself every step of the way. 

Once you get into the swing of things and, if you make sure that your steps are small and simple enough you will start to find it easier and easier to achieve your goals. 

Claire Confidencebuilding



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